Babies and Boobies and Rapists, Oh My!

My dreams last night…oh gawd. They were pretty good ones, haha.

I had two separate dreams–the first one, I actually kind of know why it had some of the elements that it did, which I’ll tell you after I explain the dream.
So, the dream was a little bit choppy, and there are bits that I can’t remember, but from what I DO remember, I know that my mom was 9 months pregnant (and keep in mind–my mom is in her late 40s right now, so she’s probably not going to get pregnant in real life any time soon), and the HR lady from my work (don’t even ask me why she was in my dream–I have no clue whatsoever) was maybe 3 or 4 months pregnant. My mom was about to deliver, but she had to wait. Somehow, my HR lady was supposed to be her surrogate mother….something like my mom would have the baby, but it would come out through her..? I dunno. But my mom had to wait, because my HR lady hadn’t shown up yet. Eventually, she “fired” the HR lady, because she was really, really late. Then there was something about the sperm donor being there, and he tried to rape some other chick, and he got “fired” as well….like I said, very choppy dream, but still strange.
Now, the explanation.
Like I said, I’m not sure why my HR lady was in the dream, but as far as my mom being in the dream, that was due to the fact that I noticed I had a missed call on my phone from my mom right before I went to bed. As far as the pregnancies go, there were two reasons for that–first of all, I have a pregnant friend who has a baby shower this Saturday–I had received the invitation earlier that day. In addition to that, I think the reason why there were TWO pregnant women was because I had read an article earlier that day about two sisters delivering babies on the same day. haha As for the rest of it….nooooo clue.

The second dream was even weirder.

I was with my friend Carol, and I was on my computer, looking at her Facebook page. I saw a picture of her and another girl (or so I thought), and the other girl was half-naked, covering up her A-cup boobs/nipples with each hand. The other girl had really short hair, and looked kind of like a femenine boy. I turned to Carol, and said, “hey, I didn’t know you were a lesbian!” and Carol turned to me and said, “I’m not! Even though it looks like he has boobs, he’s still a team player ‘down there’” and she motioned to her crotch. She then proceeded to explain to me (with pictures, too) that the guy had extra fat deposits right where boobs would be, and showed me pictures of him not covering them, and they didn’t even have nipples….
That was all, really.
NO CLUE where that dream came from O___o

But then again, that’s why I made this blog in the first place, right?

Updates and a New Dream

Hey guys–sorry I haven’t been posting many dreams lately.  I’ve been having a LOT of them, but, strangely enough, haven’t been able to remember them  :/

Like, I’ll wake up after one of my dreams, and think to myself, “whoa, THAT was a weird one…gotta make sure I make a blog entry about it!” but then when I go to write it (generally only about an hour or two after I’ve woken up), I can’t remember it at all.  Dunno why.
BUT!
I DO remember the one I had last night 

I remember that I was a member of a family–mom, stepdad, me, and my brother (which is what I had in real life, too, but this one wasn’t the same at ALL), and the stepdad in this dream was totally evil.  He had very strict, “Christian” rules (what HE called Christian), and we weren’t allowed to do anything, really.  Weren’t allowed to have mp3 players, go on the internet, all that kind of stuff.  He would give each of us $5 a week for food, and that was it, because he was “trying to save money.”  My mom was just passive about the whole thing, saying, “well, just listen to him.  He knows what’s best.”
At one point, I ran away from home, and was gone for about two years.  When I finally came back, my brother was wearing really tattered clothes, and my mom was the same way.  My brother told me that the stepdad had changed the rules so that he would give us $1 each day for food, but that was all.  One day, when nobody was home, I went and got some sort of weapon similar to a light saber, and I killed him.  The way I killed him was by slicing him in half a few different ways, and when I say the weapon was similar to a light saber, that’s because when I sliced him in half, it was like slicing throug butter.

There were a few guys there when I killed him, and they saw the whole thing–they were either my friends, or they were workers in our house…I’m really not sure which.  They said that they would take the blame for killing him so that I wouldn’t get in trouble, and because they hated him, too, and wanted to have the credit for it.

That’s pretty much it–short dream, but quite strange.

Food Fights and Acid

Had another dream about that girl at work that I hate.
This time though, it was less like I liked her, and more like real life. haha
Basically, she and I were talking, and eventually got into an argument, and we just happened to be eating lunch at that time…so we started having a food fight. At one point, she stole some of my food, and then I stole some of hers, and then it was all just chaos.
Again, very, very short.

Then I had a second dream right after, and I was in my apartment–but my OLD apartment (the one I lived in before my boyfriend and I moved in with our current two roommates). One of the roommates–James–was in the apartment with us. Now, keep in mind, in real life, we’re all the kind of people who play computer games all the time and don’t get out much. None of us has ever done drugs–not even smoked weed. All of a sudden, James turned to my boyfriend and I and said, “hey, I have some acid! You want some?” and my boyfriend and I were very excited about this.
I don’t know what form acid is in in real life, but in this dream, our “acid” was some big, round tablets that James referred to as “tabs” of acid. I took half of one of these, and everything became really vivid–especially colors. Then everything went to black and white, then back in color, then back to black and white, and back and forth like that for awhile. After a minute or two of this, I started freaking out, and worrying that I was going to be stuck in a permatrip.
Then I woke up.

WTF.
Seriously. XDD

I Hate You…but Have Some Ice Cream…

This dream was short, but still quite strange.

So, there’s this girl that I LOATHE at work–we clash so much that we’ve taken it up with HR because we sit RIGHT next to each other (and, obviously, neither one of us WANTS to be right next to each other).  Had a dream last night that I was trying to talk to her, and I offered her some of my lip gloss….which looked, felt, and tasted like ice cream.  Like, a big bowl of chocolate ice cream with caramel and chocolate syrup drizzled all over it….but it was somehow lip gloss.

That’s all the dream was, really.

Told you it was short.  lol

When Chimps Attack

So, let me begin by saying that this has got to be THE strangest dream I’ve ever had, mostly due to the fact that I can’t find a single connection in it to real life. Unlike most of my other dreams, for this one, I don’t know what inspired any part of it–it was just random and weird. That being said, the dream started out with a chimpanzee.

I was sitting on a bench somewhere, and I was reading something, or looking off into space–basically, just not really paying attention to anything around me. Suddenly, I heard a sound near my feet. I looked down, and there was a chimp sitting there, looking at me angrily. I stood up in surprise, and the chimp started to talk to me–he asked me something similar to, “what states are classified as being states in the midwest??,” to which I replied, “uhhh….I…..don’t know? Washing…ton..?,” and the chimp got angry, and yelled something like, “NO!! THAT’S WRONG!!!!” and attacked me. It was biting me and hitting me, and at some point, sprayed an extremely hot liquid on me, which made my skin blister in some places.
I managed to run away from the chimp, and got to some sort of a greenhouse, which my mother was working at for some reason. This greenhouse was like our home–it looked like a greenhouse in all respects, just plants in it and nothing more, but in my head, I knew it was our house.
I frantically began telling my mom about what had happened, and I was still blistered.
Throughout the dream, the chimpanzee kept popping up randomly, harassing me every time. Sometimes, it would even turn into a man (who was still harassing me). At one point, he even tricked me into breaking a bracelet that my mother had given me (he tricked me into doing it myself, I mean). Eventually, I went to some sort of a Native American tribal leader, who explained to me that a ritual had been performed to make all of this happen. It had something to do with taking objects that symbolized the situation, and that would make it my destiny for these things with the chimp to happen.
At one point, I decided to fight back, and made some sort of a battle bunker….but this bunker was made out of my old room (my old room in REAL life–the room I lived in at my mom’s house). By talking to the tribal leader, I had learned when the next attack was supposed to happen, and that’s how I knew when to be prepared. I found out that the hot liquid was some sort of extremely hot Indian soup, and I learned that the chimpanzee was going to shoot this soup at me via a remote-controlled little box. I learned how to get access to this box so I could use it against him.
The time came, and the chimp showed up, in human form. I started fighting him by using the box to spray him with the soup when he was further away from me, and I would lock myself in the room if he ever came too close. I was able to defeat him, and stop all the harassment.

The second dream I had (same sleep period, but a separate dream) involved a girl named Fnowee. That’s how it was spelled, for some reason, but it was pronounced “Snowy”…..don’t ask me why it was spelled with an F, ’cause I have no clue, honestly.
Fnowee and her boyfriend were in some foreign country, and the couple were in their 20s. They crashed some random wedding, just to attend it, and the bride wound up discovering that they weren’t invited, but wasn’t angry, and she wound up giving them one of her wedding gifts–a handheld salt and pepper mill (the kind where you squeeze the handle to grind the salt/pepper). Then, Fnowee and her boyfriend were walking down a sidewalk in a suburban neighborhood, and they were talking about dancing. Fnowee claimed that she had never actually slow-danced with her boyfriend, and her boyfriend was arguing that they had. He said, “yes, we did! At junior prom, remember?” and at that point, since he was talking to Fnowee instead of looking where he was going, he walked right into a low-hanging tree branch that was over the sidewalk.
He fell to the ground, and Fnowee knelt by him, but other than that gesture, the two of them continued the conversation as though it didn’t happen. The boyfriend (by now I’m sure you’ve realized that his name was never mentioned in the dream ) kept saying that they had slow-danced at junior prom, but Fnowee was saying that she didn’t even GO with him to junior prom, so that wasn’t possible.
The dream then cut into some kind of a flashback for Fnowee, and she was back at her mother’s house, and was in high school again. She lived with her mother and her 3 year old sister, who liked to annoy Fnowee all the time, much like the chimpanzee had been annoying me in the previous dream.
In the flashback, Fnowee was talking about how she was an outcast in high school because she was very strange. She wanted her hair to be gold–like the actual metal–but knew that she couldn’t do that, because there wasn’t a hair dye in the world that would make her hair gold. So she dyed it different colors–blue and pink were two that she mentioned.
At another point in this flashback, Fnowee was in the middle of doing something, and knew that her little sister–whom she called “it,” because she terrorized Fnowee so much–was going to be coming home from preschool any minute. Fnowee asked her mom if she could distract her little sister so that Fnowee could finish up with what she was doing without being interrupted. Fnowee’s mom held out both hands (so as to symbolize that she was “weighing her options”), and was going back and forth–one hand representing “don’t help Fnowee,” and the other hand symbolizing, “tie ‘it’ to a tree.” Eventually, her mom laughed, and said that sure, she would help.
The flashback ended, and Fnowee and her boyfriend were again sitting on the sidewalk and talking.

Then my alarm clock woke me up.

…Very, very strange dreams……

Not a dream, but I would just like to say…

I would just like to say how relieved I am that Miley Cyrus has stopped appearing in my dreams….for now, at least.

The “dream” her is even more annoying than the real one.
That’s all. 

Full House Strippers

This dream started out in a baseball field.  Less Than Jake (a band that I actually AM very fond of) was playing a show in the middle of the baseball diamond, and all was going well.

Then the dream switched to me being one of the Tanners (the family in the show Full House), and we were watching “Uncle Joey” and “Uncle Jesse” rehearsing for a show that they were to perform later that night, at the same baseball diamond…..and this show happened to be something like Chippendale’s….they were both in thongs.  O_o

So the dream switches back to the baseball diamond, and now “Uncle Jesse” and his band are playing a show in the middle of the diamond (right where Less Than Jake had been).  Meanwhile, “Uncle Joey” and the rest of the family were trying to find there seats in the crowd.

The show ended, and as “Uncle Jesse”‘s band was walking to go backstage, I saw my friend Kasie (a girl who, in real life, I knew when I was growing up), who was screaming wildly with a bunch of other girls like their band was the Beatles.  Kasie threw him a bouquet of roses.

Then the time came for the strip show, but it had to be canceled, because it had started to rain.  Everyone was disappointed, but I told them that I had gotten a preview of the show, and assured them that it was “very good.”

XDDD
Ohhh, the dreams I have…..

Visit to My Grandmother’s House

Had a dream that I had just started dating this ugly girl named Sierra (yes I myself am a girl–I’m bi. Get over it. lol) who was about 6 inches shorter than me, kind of skinny, and had brown hair that was a puffy afro thing that looked like Annie’s hair (from the broadway musical Annie). Dunno what I saw in her that made me want to date her, and she isn’t even based on anybody that I know in real life….I don’t even know a person named Sierra, much less one as ugly as this girl was.
Anyhow. I decided to take Sierra to my paternal grandmother’s house–which, in real life, is in Connecticut, and I live in Florida. So in real life, this would have been a plane ride, but in the dream, we just “wound up” there.
So we walked into the house, and I was giving her a tour–showing her all the cool rooms. In real life, this house is two stories, and a pretty modest size. In the dream, it was HUMONGOUS, and so big that at one point in the dream, I got lost while I was giving her the tour. In the dream, there was a hospital in the house, and even a training facility for female FBI agents. Eventually, we went into a kitchen, and my MATERNAL grandmother was there, and when we walked into this kitchen, she yelled at us, saying that I should never take people in there if I’m taking them on a tour of the house.
Eventually, we found my paternal grandmother and grandfather (and in real life, my paternal grandfather died last year..), but my grandfather didn’t look like my grandfather–he looked like the grandfather in Gilmore Girls (who is actor Edward Herrmann), but it was definitely still my grandfather. I told them about what my maternal grandmother had said, and they said something like, “what the fuck? It’s not even her house!” [specifically with the word "fuck" in it....and no, my paternal grandparents
don't/didn't cuss like that in real life].
I then proceeded to show Sierra the “games room,” where there were a bunch of arcade games that we started to play.

At some point I woke up….the dream didn’t end abruptly though….just kind of faded out……

My “Dream” Concert

Bare with me–this is my first post via email, so I’m not really sure how it’s going to turn out.
Anyhow.

Had a dream last night that, first of all, I was helping my dad hang pictures on the walls of his apartment….in real life, he lives in CT (I’m in FL), and he doesn’t even have an apartment–he lives with my grandmother and uncle in my grandmother’s house, and takes care of her.
So I was helping him hang up these pictures, and then he gave me tickets to a concert. I went to the concert with him, my mom (which never would have happened–my mom HATES him, and they’ve been divorced since I was 7), my friend Amy from work, and my brother. The concert was going to have Green Day opening for Britney Spears….yeeaahhhhh.
But for some reason that I can’t remember, I had to leave before any of the bands had even started. I remember in the dream going to “work” the next day, and asking Amy if she remembered why I had to leave early, because I couldn’t remember, and she said she didn’t know.
My brother was at my work too, and he claimed that it was because of some random guy there that I didn’t like. I told him that wasn’t true.
Amy then proceeded to tell me that, after the concert, they had all gotten backstage passes somehow, and had met Green Day and gotten their autographs. I started crying because I had missed out on that. ((and in real life, I no longer like Green Day. They were my favorite band when I was 11 or 12–about 2 years before American Idiot came out–but since then, I haven’t much liked their sound))
The next day, I went to school–which was high school (I graduated 2007)–and rode there on a bike. I met up with my friend J’net, who was telling me how she was lying to this little girl, telling her she liked her macaroni necklace when it was really the most hideous thing she had ever seen.

Woke up from there…
Not the strangest of my dreams, but still pretty weird.

RANDOM UPDATE!

So, you may be wondering where I’ve been.
No, I haven’t stopped having fucking insane dreams………lately, the cast of Harry Potter have been starring…..not sure where the hell they came from.

But my computer is on its last legs–sometimes it wants to boot to windows, and then, for the past 3 weeks or so, it didn’t……..and about two days ago, it did.
My uber techie boyfriend says that he thinks there’s something wrong with the motherboard, and that it doesn’t have much longer to live, so we’ll see what happens.
I’ll update when I can though–sorry for the unexpected hiatus!

-R